An unsettled night

The night shift did not go too well last night. The twins settled off nicely and I managed to get a good sleep before Wolfie woke up just before 3. I was so tired that I just took him through to Evil boy and did not bother trying to get him to settle off again.

Malach then woke up. I thought he would do, as he did not take a night feed. He settled off quickly though and I managed to get him back in his basket. It was then that I could not get back to sleep. I had very unsettled sleep until about 6am when I when I managed to get a couple of hours good sleep.

I fed the twins and then got some breakfast. I then brought the washing in and as Devil boy’s daughter was on my computer I just went through and changed the twins and fed them again.

Devil boy took his daughter home and I turned off the TV and started playing some music. Wolfie has been watching too much TV recently so I decided that we should have some TV free time. I sorted out Wolfie some lunch and I fed the twins.

When Devil boy got back I started feeling uptight for some reason. I am not sure why though. I then had to scan some pictures in and I started to feel really irritable. I always get like that when I feel like I am being rushed. I think that will be one of the last things that I will need to work on as sorting out my short temper and depression are the first things to get sorted.

In the afternoon I got the twins ready and went out to see Devil boys mum and dad as they are in the area at the moment. They were unfortunately out when I got there but I was at least happy for getting out and getting some exercise. It also helped Elbereth settled back off to sleep as she had been crying.

I was able to get some dinner when I got in and Devil boy sorted out dinner for Wolfie. I then started work on cleaning the kitchen. I sorted out the recyclables (I will take them out tomorrow) and I cleaned the cooker and well as sorting out one of the sides. The kitchen is beginning to look so much better now.


After that I got Wolfies room ready and I was about to start work on cleaning the living room when I saw that Devil boy had already made a start on it. I took over form him. I think he was a bit upset through. I just like things to be in a certain way but he thinks that I think that he is incapable but that it not true.

He ran the bath for Wolfie and bathed him and put him to bed. I then bathed and fed the twins. I do not get the chance to bathe them often. I just get the chance to quickly wash them. It was nice to give them a bath for a change.

I am going to make sure that I get an early night as possible as I am tired and aching and I could do with a good sleep (not that I think that will happen for a while though)

Starting to get the flat sorted out

The night shift went well. Evil boy and I did not manage to get the early night, as we both did not feel that bad in the end. The twins settled off nicely and we all got a good sleep. Wolfie woke at 5am but I just took him through to Devil boy.

The twins slept well and I woke them up for a feed at around 9am. I slept later than I had wanted to but I struggled to wake up. I am going to sort out that out as I would like to get up early as I have so much that I have to get done and I seem to get a lot done if I manage to get up early.

I had a parcel delivered to me today. It was one of the Star Wars books that I ordered yesterday. I was not expecting it to arrive today so I was really happy about that. I will read that once I have read the books that I got with my last order.


I got up and had my breakfast. For some reason Wolfie is not eating his porridge at the moment. Maybe it is because he is not feeling well at the moment or maybe he just wants a break from it for now. He ate up the bran flakes that we gave him though. Our noses are running nicely at the moment. My nose is sore from having to wipe it lots.

Devil boy took Wolfie over to his grandmas in the morning so I was able to change and feed the twins without Wolfie running through to us. I was also able to read to them without coughing too much.

In the afternoon I managed to get the clothes in the cot folded up and the washing put out on the line. The cot in the twin’s room is now empty so I am thinking of putting the twins in it at some point. I might try and settle them off in it in the next week or two.

I also managed to order the food order online and I managed to get it delivered for tomorrow. I have managed to get lots of funky thing. Devil boy and I are going to have a Mexican night in the next week. It has been a long time since we had some Mexican food that it will be funky when the order arrives.

The rest of the afternoon went funkily and I managed to get a brisk walk out. I was only supposed to go to the local shop but the cash point did not have any money in it so I had to go to the shop up the hill. I managed to get some things that I would not have been able to get in the local shop so I was happy that I had to go a bit further as well as for the exercise.

When I got home I fed the twins while reading to them. While I was feeding them mum phoned up to let me know that my brother is leading in a golf competition that he is playing in Italy. That is so funky. It is the last round tomorrow so I really hope that he manages to win.

I then had dinner and after that I tidied Wolfie room and finished sorting out his bath. As Devil boy’s daughter was over she kept him entertained in the bath while I helped Devil boy clean up the living room.

Thankfully Wolfie settled off to sleep first time tonight. I gave him some Calpol before I read to him so hopefully that will help him get a good rest.

I then changed the twins. They were loud while I was changing them so I gave them a dummy to use while I was changing them. Elbereth loot a while to get used to it but Malach took to it strait away. Both of them though spat it out after a short while. I think because I have managed to not use dummies they are not fussed about them. This has made me decide that when Devil boy is away at the rock festival I am going to wean Wolfie off the dummy altogether.

As Devil boy’s daughter is over I am going to make sure that I take the twins though early so that we can all get an early night. Have not been able to get ready for 9 though as Wolfie went to bed later than usual. Thankfully I should be ready by 10 though.

We are still not feeling well

The night shift went really well. While it took Wolfie a while to settle off he slept through until 6am. I do not know why he is not settling well at night.

The twins slept really well. I decided not to disturb Elbereth for a night feed but I gave Malach a night feed. They then slept though the night until about 7am when I gave then a feed before getting up for breakfast.

Unfortunately my breakfast was a bit burned so it put me off. I managed to browse the Internet and I had some toast. I sorted out some washing and I went through to sort the twins out.

I managed to get some money saved and I managed to order some Star Wars books. I have ordered The Jedi academy trilogy, outbound flight and tales form the Empire. I am really looking forward to them arriving. When these books arrive I will have 24 Star Wars books. I still have a lot to get but I am making good progress now. I have started reading Return of the Jedi today. I have not been reading it out loud to the twins yet though as I keep coughing when I try.


Devil boy then went out with Wolfie to collect his guitar that had been repaired. His mum took him in the car. Wolfie loves going in the car. While they were away I sorted out the napes to get washed, pinned the other stuff out and started cleaning the kitchen.

I managed to make good progress with the kitchen. I managed to clear one of the sides and sort out the recyclables. I will take them to the recycle bins tomorrow at some point. Hopefully I will make even better progress tomorrow when Devil boy’s daughter is over.

When Devil boy got back shortly after I managed to get Wolfie to take a nap. He was so tired and very cranky. I then got ready and went out to get some things sorted out. I went up to the bank and then I went to the shops to get some things. I also made an appointment for the doctor’s next Tuesday. My cold feels like it has developed into a chest infection. I really struggled to get to the shops and I had a familiar feeling in my chest from all of the chest infections that I had years ago. I was going to wait until next Wednesday but I do not see the point of waiting now.

I was going to call in and see my friend but I decided against that as I did not want to pass on my bug to any of them. I might call in after I have seen the doctor on Tuesday.


When I got back I quickly went back out to go and see my friend to thank her for the clothes that she gave me for Elbereth. That was so funky of her to do that. Some of the clothes have not been worn. I was going to just say thank you in the doorway to prevent me passing on my bug but she said that her daughter was ill with as cold so I went in to chat for a short while. I did not stay for long though. I was actually lucky to catch them in, as they were about to go out themselves.

When I got back I went and sorted out the twins. They were ready for a feed. Wolfie kept pottering in and out of the room and climbing on the bed. He was thankfully not any bother though and if he picked up something that he should not do I put my hand to him and he passed it to me with out a tantrum. It was quite fun with him being silly.

He was taken for his bath and I cleaned up his bedroom ready for him to go to bed and cleared up his toy in the living room. Once Devil boy was getting him ready for bed I booked the train tickets for Devil boy and his friend to go to a festival in June. Because I booked them in advance I got the tickets on special offer and they are just under half their normal price, which is a very funky deal. I must admit that I am looking forward to him going away for a\ few days. It will be nice getting the flat kind of to myself for a few days. Hopefully by then the twins will be settling off earlier as well so I might get some peace at night.

Wolfie did not settle off well though and it took about an hour before he settle doff to sleep. I do not know what is causing it at the moment. Maybe it is to do with him not being well recently but I hope it does not last too much longer. Hopefully he will sleep through the night.

Both Devil boy and I are going to get early nights tonight, as we are both feeling ill. All I have to do is sort out the twins and do a little cleaning up before I go to bed. Hopefully we will all get a good sleep.

Devil boy and I are still irritable but I managed to get to my physiotherapy appointment

The night shift went really well. I managed to get the twins settled off nicely and even though I went to bed quite late Wolfie slept until around 6am so I was able to get a good sleep.

Both Devil boy and I are still feeling very irritable. I think with me I am tired of not being able to get on top of the housework. I would love to have a day free so that I could just blitz the place but that it’s not going to happen. I have decided that I am going to get something sorted out tomorrow when Devil boy’s daughter is over. I really have to get on top of the housework. I am sick of constantly tripping over things. We need to declutter and we do need to move into a bigger place.

I got a funky thing sent to me from a friend in an E-Mail. It is a quote form Star Wars but it is true. Part of it is ‘every problem or crisis can be solved by one mandate “Time and Patients”. Give anything a little time and one calm patients then anything can be resolved.’ I need to remember that for when I am feeling at my most irritable. I am sure that we will get through this phase. The other part is this. I have put this onto my desktop to remind me.


I fed the twins and then got up and had some breakfast. I browsed the Internet and then sorted out some washing. My cold has definitely taken hold today. I have got a rather tickly cough and I have lost a lot of my voice. I also have a sore throat. Thankfully I feel well in myself.

The morning seemed to fly by though and after changing the twins and feeding them again I did not have much time to have lunch before I had to go out for my physiotherapy appointment.

I was rather worried about getting the bus on time and finding the place. I managed to get a bottle of water before I went for my bus. I got on the bus and I managed to get a bit of reading done before I had to change bus in the next town. I asked the driver to tell me which stop to get off.

I did not have to wait long before it was my stop and I was lucky that an older woman showed me where the health centre was and she also pointed out where the bus stop was for getting back home. I thought that was really nice of her.

I was there early so I was able to read for a bit before I was seen. It was also baby clinic day so I also managed to see one of the women who helps out for the baby clinic that I go to. I chatted to her for a short while as well. I was able to tell her that I will not be at clinic next week. I told her why and she understood. She was very funky saying how well I manage them when I am out and about and that how calm I am. (I am hoping that my irritable phase passes soon so I can get back to being like that again)

The physiotherapy appointment went well and she told me some exercises that I could do. She also told me that Yoga is also good so I will start doing that again as well. She was telling me that my bad back could be caused but the fact I have rather flexible joints. I cannot really remember what she told me about why it caused it but she also told me that another thing that happens is that you lose you footing. This explains that why sometime when I am walking I go to take a sep and my ankle gives way.

The woman tested out a lot of things. She told me that my posture was good. I was pleased about that because I have been making a lot of effort recently with it. She also found a knot in my back but hopefully the exercises will help that. She then gave me some tips for when feeding the twins and for times that I am reading.

I will go back in a month for another appointment in about a month’s time. She is not sure though if that will clash with her holiday, as she has not got her calendar but she said she would contact me if there were a problem.

I looked at the time and the appointment had finished just after my bus had gone past the stop so I asked if I could sit in the centre and read (the library next door was shut) OI sat and read for a bit and then went out to catch the next bus. I sat and read while waiting. I waited and I waited and I waited some more. I finished my book and I waited some more. After I had waited for about 40 minutes I went back to the centre to ask if they could make a phone call for me. My mobile battery was dead. The receptionist phoned devil boy to tell me about the delay and I went out to wait for the bus to turn up.

I was so happy when it arrived and it was not too long before I was back home. Devil boy had not long made dinner so I was able to get something when I got in.

Elbereth had not been awake for long and Malach was still sleeping. I fen fed Elbereth and then I cleaned and sorted out Wolfies room while Devil boy ran his bath.

I then bathed Wolfie and put him to bed. He unfortunately did not settled off so I spent the next house changing and feeding Elbereth while going through to Wolfie to try and settle him off. I was just about to go and change Malach when I managed to get him to settle off in the end. It had been a long day for him so I think he got over tired.

I then changed and fed Malach and cleaned the living room up. Both Devil boy and I are feeling tired so we are going to make sure that we are going to get an early night tonight. The only things that I have to do now is rely to a friends message and then clean up a bit before giving the twins their night feed.

A down day

The night shift went well. The twins slept well and Wolfie slept through until about 4am. I did not hear him this morning though which is unusual. I must have been in a deep sleep for a change as I normally hear him first. Devil boy went through to him though. I was just waking up when I heard him go through for him.

I fed the twins and then I got up and had breakfast and browsed the Internet before going through and changing and feeding the twins again. They did not seem that keen to take proper feeds though and I let myself get into a flap about it. I could not read to them because any move that I made meant that they wound come off. I was very frustrated about this and I became irritable and started to feel down.

I managed to get them settled off and I got myself some lunch. After lunch I got the nappies in from outside and put the clothes out on the line that I had washed earlier before stating to sort through the stuff that I had piled on my bed. Unfortunately my heart was not in it and after another failed attempt at trying to feed the twins I really became down and I snapped at Devil boy a few times. It also did not help that he was also feeling down today. Neither of us could help the other out.

Devil boy’s daughter came around today so she ran around with Wolfie keeping him entertained and I replied to a friends E-Mail.

I then needed to go out and get some things for dinner as there were not yoghurts in the house and I got some soup for Devil boy. I was glad for the excuse to get out and get some fresh air. I was hoping that getting out might help pick me up. It unfortunately did not and no matter what I did I could not shake off how I was feeling.

After dinner I made up a batch of short bread for Devil boy and I (his bath had butter in and mine had soya margarine in it) and afterward Devil boy washed the dishes while I browsed the Internet for a short while. I then went through and cleaned Wolfies bedroom and got his stuff ready for his bed time while his daughter entertained him during his bath time.

Dad phoned to let me know about his results with his consultant today. It was thankfully good news. He heart is getting back to a normal size and is showing signs of making a good recovery. Though I wish they had phoned at a better time, as I was not able to chat with full concentration. They for some reason seem to call at the time of the day when I am very busy (bedtime for Wolfie) I will call them tomorrow night for a proper chat though.

There was then a knock at the door and Devil boy answered. I did not see who it was but it was one of my friends. They had dropped off a huge bag of clothes for Elbereth. That was so nice and as I looked through the bag I worked out who it was. The clothes are lovely. I will have to call around tomorrow to thank them. I would have done it tonight but I have lost their phone number.

Devil boy then went out to his friend’s house to watch the football and I attempted to give the twins another feed. It again did not go well so I decided to have my bath anyway. The twins cried all the way through my bath but I managed to have a nice soak and sort out my hair. While I was soaking in the bath I decided that I would probably not take the twins to clinic next week. I am getting myself into such a state about them that it will do more harm than good. They told me not to worry but I cannot help it and I am getting myself into an awful state. I am getting more and more worried and I am beginning to snap at the twins. I do not like this at all and I especially do not like feeling like how I have felt today which I think is due to worrying about how Malach is feeding. This is the worst I have felt for a while and certainly since the twin’s was born. I think they have picked up on it as they were challenging at some points.


When I got out of the bath I changed the twins and fed them. Elbereth did not feed for long but she brought up excess afterward which made me feel a little better and I managed to get Malach to get a good feed. I think that once I had decided not to take the twins to clinic next week it helped me enough to relax and they picked up on it. They have both now settled of nicely.

Thankfully by the time that Devil boy got back I was feeling much better and he too was feeling better as well. Though the both of us feel a little sick. Hopefully a good night’s sleep will sort that out.

Devil boy got me directions on how to get to the place where I will have my physiotherapy and which bus to catch. I am looking forward to that so I am going to make sure that I get to bed not too late. All I need to do is clear up. I will reply to my friends E-Mails and messages in the morning when I am bright eyed and busy tailed (I wish)

I got the twins weighed again

The night shift did not start out well. Wolfie woke up before we went to bed and it took a long time to settle him off again. He had a temperature and was coughing and sneezing. I unfortunately did not have nay Calpol to give him.

Devil boy eventually settled him off to sleep. I made a suggestion to Devil boy and he thought that it was funky. What we are going to do is alternate putting Wolfie to bed so he gets used to the both of us putting him to bed. After Wolfie had settled I fed and changed the twins before getting to bed at around 1am. The twins settled off nicely and Wolfie thankfully slept until 6am.

I had a good sleep but it took me a while to wake up in the morning. I fed the twins and got up at around 9.30. I had a browse of the Internet while I had my breakfast. Though for some reason I felt uptight in the morning. I got in a flap about the jobs that I needed to get done. I managed to get them done well though. I put a wash load of nappies in, phoned to find out when my physiotherapy appointment is, cancelled the minibus picking me up for Homestart as it was at the same time and then sorted out the twins. I am looking forward to hopefully getting my back sorted out. I know it will not happen quickly but I am hoping to get some exercises to help me hopefully get some ideas about how to sit properly.


I got some lunch and I fed the twins before I got Wolfie, Elbereth and Malach ready to go up to the clinic. On the way up I called into the charity shop and gave them my old skateboard. I bought it years ago as I thought it would be a funky way of getting to work but I never got around to it and I have only used it once.

Unfortunately though on my way into the shop I accidentally caught Wolfies hand on the door (he was in the pram again) It hurt him bless him and his finger swelled up and there was a red mark on his wrist. I checked his wrist though and it felt all right and his finger felt fine. I went up to the clinic and I asked my health visitor to check it. She said that it was fine.

I got the twins weighed. Elbereth has done well. She has gone from 3.66 Kg (8lb 1oz) to 3.82 Kg (8lb 7oz) but Malach has gone from 4.32 Kg (9lb 8oz) to 4.26 (9lb 6 ½oz) The health visitors told me not too worry as they still think he is getting on funkily but I can not help but worry. Thinking about it though I do not think he has been getting proper feeds form me when he has been feeding. I have to make sure that he stays awake and gets a good feed. I will take them back next week.

On my way home I struggled up the hill with the pram. I had to use the smaller pram today but it is not that easy to push around as the frame keeps folding in on itself while I am pushing it. I could feel my arms getting a really good workout as I fought the pram wanting to go to the left. When I was walking home I bumped into someone that I knew who was walking her dog (A gorgeous Wolf like dog) and she saw how exhausted I looked and pushed the pram up the hill for me. I thought that was really nice of her and we had a nice chat as well.

I then called in to see a friend on the way home. It was nice calling in and seeing her again. I do not get to see her and her daughter very much. She has an 11-year-old son. He chatted to us for a bit and held Malach. He made me laugh though when he first asked if the twins were talking yet and then later when he asked it they were walking or crawling. Bless him. He is a funky lad.

When I got home I had a snack and then after dinner I remembered that I needed to get some Calpol for Wolfie. I was about to go out when I could not find my wallet. I checked at my friend’s house but it was not there. Thankfully though I had some money on me so I could get the Calpol. Thankfully though as I walked in through a different door I saw the bag with my wallet in it.

Devil boy bathed Wolfie for me tonight as I had a lot to do and once he bathed him I got him ready for bed and read to him. I really enjoyed it and he settled off to sleep and hopefully he will sleep nicely tonight. Though at least I have some Calpol if he does wake up.

I then browsed the Internet, renewed playing my Star Wars computer game and then fed the twins. I had to make sure that Malach stayed away and at times he kept bobbing off but hopefully he got a proper feed. We will just have to see what the next week brings. I have not managed to get much reading today with the feeding. I will have to make up for it tomorrow. I have also been a bit lapse with the competitions. I think I will take a week or two off form them and then start from a fresh. I do not have the time to catch up. I think what I will do it not fill the competitions from the magazines that I have got and then be up to date from this Thursdays magazine’s.

The night has gone well and I remembered to get a pot of boiled water to cleanse Malachs eye. It has really flared up today and is rather gungy. The only things that I have to do tonight are to clean up a little and then get the twins ready for bed.

Operation teach Wolfie to sleep an undisturbed night’s sleep

The night shift did not go well unfortunately. Wolfie is not settling well at all. The twins settled off well but I did not give them their last feed at night, as I was tired so they woke up at 3am. They settled quickly though after they were fed and they settled back in their baskets, which was really funky.

Wolfie though would not settle at all. I tried several things but he would not settle. I was feeding Malach when Devil boy went to get him when he was crying at one point. I am going to have to get something sorted though and I have to get tough. I have decided that from tomorrow I will be sergeant mother. I will get him back into a good sleeping habit.


As a result of the broken night I woke up later that I wanted to. I made up for it though and I made breakfast for Wolfie, Devil boy and I before going out to pay the council tax (LOL I forgot that you do not need to pay for April but I paid Mays so I do not need to pay now until June)

When I got back I changed, fed the twins (and got Wolfie his lunch) and got ready to go out to the rhyme and time. I was a little delayed though as the twins both decided to mess their nappies and Malach needed a outfit change.

I tried something new today. It is a bit too far for Wolfie to walk at the moment so what I did was put Wolfie into the double buggy and I carried one of the twins in the baby carrier that I have. It worked really well and as I took my big pram it was easier to push the extra weight.

Rhyme and time went really well. I had Elbereth on my lap and Wolfie joined me for a few of the songs as well. I also managed to feed the twins while I was there. I really enjoyed it this week. I found out that the woman who runs the group has found out that she is expecting a girl so I am going to save Elbereth’s clothes for her to use. It is off next week as the centre is shut for Mayday. When I next go to it I will remember to take the reins for Wolfie so that he can walk on the way back home. It will be good for him to walk at least one way.

After the group I called in at Devil boys grandmas for a short while. I had a nice time and as the weather was warm I was able to let Wolfie run about the garden and leave the door open for him to come and go as he pleased.

When I got back I decided to let Wolfie run about in the back garden and work on decluttering the shed. Elbereth was asleep in the pram and as I carried Malach back I put him in his basket to settle for a nap.

I managed to make good progress and the shed is beginning to look a lot clearer. I am confident that by the end of the summer I will have cleared it out. I am going to move all of my books from the shed into the flat (I just need to find room for them) I also managed to being a box of things to be sorted into the house and I added a lot of the clutter from the kitchen into it. That cleared up one of the sides I am determined that this will be the year of sorting through the clutter.

I then had to go out to the shop and get some food for dinner. I have definitely done my fair share of exercise for today. Hopefully I will have lost some weight this Thursday when I weigh myself.

Wolfie has been a complete angel today. He was good in the morning, really funky ad rhyme and time and at Devil boy’s grandmas and really funky when I got home. In the garden he played really nicely and when he was waiting for his dinner he patently waited and sat in his high chair and did not scream. I feel so proud of him and even though he is going through the challenging twos it is days like this that make me feel so proud and even more determined that I keep on keeping control of my temper.

After dinner he had his bath and Devil boy put him to bed. He settled off perfectly and I fed the twins. I am going to make sure that they get both of their feeds tonight and I also am going to make sure that I get an early night, as I will need my strength for the night shift. Tonight I shall be sergeant/Jedi mummy…may the force be with me…

A rather disturbed night shift

The night shift did not go well unfortunately. After I took the twins through they fed well and I managed to finish the Star wars book a new hope. I was just about to give Malach his last feed of the day when Wolfie woke up. I went through to see to him and I managed to get him to settle and I then fed and managed to get Malach to settle.

Though Wolfie woke up again at 2am. It took several times before he settled off to sleep through and I was really shattered and rather irritable by then. He unfortunately he did not stay asleep either. He woke up at just before 3 and I decided that I would take him through to Devil boy. I was thinking at the time that it is amusing that my three-month-old twins sleep better that he does at the moment. I really do not know why he is not sleeping well but I am going to try and tuck his sheets tomorrow night and see if that makes any difference.

In the morning it took me a while to wake up from my disturbed sleep. I gave Malach a feed in bed at around 7am and I fed Elbereth at around 9am before I got up. Once I got up though I felt all right and Devil boy made breakfast for me this morning.

After breakfast I browsed the Internet and went through to sort out the twins. I managed to make a start on the next Star Wars book. It is The Empire strikes back. I am really enjoying reading the books. I thought they would follow the films but there are differences at points which are interesting to read and you get an insight to how the characters are feeling and their thoughts.


Devil boy took his daughter back home and he then went to his friend’s house to watch the football. My friend then came around and dropped off a highchair. It is really funky and it will be really good for Wolfie to use. It can be lowered and it is a good level for him. He can climb into it and he does like it.

When she left I made some lunch for Wolfie and I managed to get use out of the high chair. He sat happily and ate his lunch. This gave me the chance to go out and not only bring in the nappies but also put out the wash load that I had washed in the morning. I then had some lunch and shared it with him.

Devil boy was not gone for long and not too long after he got back he went out in the back garden with Wolfie. He loves being outside and he loves running about and exploring while I fed the twins. Unfortunately though at some point there were some motorbikes racing through the woods at the back of our home, which really scared Wolfie. He ran back into the house, which he normally never does. I am going to have to get something done about that. It is not fair that we are excluded from walking around the wood but to scare Wolfie in his own back garden is not right.

We then had dinner and Devil boy was really feeling tired so I told him that I would put Wolfie to bed for a change. I cleaned up his room and sorted it out for bed and then once the bath had run I bathed him. It was nice doing this for a change and I also soaked my feet in the bath.

I read to him and then he settled off nicely. I remembered to tuck in his sheets. We will see how he sleeps through the night.

Elbereth was unsettled so I decided to give her a bath before I fed her. She really enjoyed her bath. She was unsure at first but after floating her in the bath she settled and was really happy. I then fed her and put her in her basket and went to sort out Malach. I decided not to bathe him tonight but I will get that sorted tomorrow. It will be a lot easier when they can support themselves as I can bathe them at the same time.

I took him through to get changed when I noticed that Wolfie was crying so I went through o see to him. I think I tucked in the sheets too tightly and he could not turn over very well. He was crying and half asleep. I cuddled him and put him back in the bed and lightly tucked in the sheets.

While I was sorting out Malach I could hear Wolfie still crying but thankfully by the time I had changed his nappy he had settled off again. Hopefully it will go well tonight. If not then it will be back to the drawing board. I must get something out though before Devil boy goes to the festival that he is going to.

I spoke to mum while I fed Malach and I had a really nice chat with her. She is getting on well and dad is still making nice recovery. They are going to get him checked on Wednesday so hopefully he will be all right. It is his 3-month post operation check.

The twins settled off after their feed and all I have to do is clean up and give the twins their last feed before crashing. Hopefully tonight’s night shift will go better tonight.

A very productive day

The nightshift went well. After I fed the twins I took them through to the back room. I thought Malach was not going to settle off at first but he managed to settle off in the end. They slept well but Wolfie unfortunately woke up at 5am.

Elbereth woke up at 7am and I gave her a feed then and I gave Malach a feed at around 8.30. I fell asleep again and got up at round 9.30. I went to check the post and I was really happy to see that the last book that I had ordered had arrived (Vision of the Future by Timothy Zahn) I noticed that the book was a lot bigger than I expected but I am looking forward to reading it. I will hopefully be ordering some more Star Wars books soon but this shall keep me entertained until they arrive.



I went through and made breakfast for Wolfie and I. Devil boy was still asleep so I did not make any for him. I then managed to wash the dishes and sort out the things for recycling while breakfast was cooling.

After breakfast I went and fed the twins. Thankfully Devil boy was up by then so I was able to change and feed the twins in peace and read to them. He then took Wolfie over to his grandmas with his daughter. After I had fed the twins I sorted out the nappy wash and put away the clothes that I had brought in from outside. I also managed to sort out the clothes that were put in the back room. I have managed to clear quite a bit from the back room and it is beginning to look a lot better. I also put some more sheets over the book cabinet so that the books are covered from view.

I also managed to get some time to relax and browse the Internet. I am planning my days out quite well. It is a little odd really but it seems that the less time you have to get things done the more you get done.

I went through and gave the twins their afternoon feed and after that I got a snack and went out to the shop to get some cat food and yoghurts. I was glad for the walk so that I could not only get a bit of fresh air but also a nice brisk walk. I have been going so often to this particular shop that I can have a nice chat with one of the women who works there.

When I got back I browsed the Internet again and hovered the living room before I went through to give the twins their late afternoon feed. I am hoping that all of this extra feeding is helping. There are lots of wet and messy nappies, which the midwife at the hospital is a good sign that they are gaining weight and today Elbereth brought up some excess milk. We will see what happens next Tuesday but I am beginning to feel more positive. I also hope that they are getting plenty of hind milk though.

Devil boy’s daughter has been running about like a loon with Wolfie today. I do like it when they play together as it means that Wolfie gets good interaction and I can easily spend my time with the twins and getting things done.

As Devil boy’s daughter is over tonight I need to make sure that I am ready to go through to the back room earlier than normal. I am about to go and clean up the kitchen and clean Wolfie room. I will do that once he is in the bath. Then all I have to do is give the twins their early evening feed before I go through to the back room. I think that when I am through I will cut out the pieces for the collage that I am making for my friend. I have not done any work on the collage for a few days and I would like to get it finished. I need to get back into the habit of making collages. I also would like to start making the collages from the pictures from the online Star Wars game. I have decided that I will not make a start on them until I have finished the collage I am working on. I do not want to fall victim of failing to finish a project once I have started it.

I took Wolfie to the doctors again and went to the park with him

The night shift did not really go that well. Not too bad though thankfully but not the best. After I had given the twins their last feed it was late again and by the time I had got to bed it was gone 1.

Wolfie woke up though at 6 this morning, which was good for him. I am hoping that he is beginning to pass through his phase that he was going through. We will see what the next few days bring though.

Elbereth though woke up at 6am for a feed so I just fed her in bed alongside me and then I fed Malach at around 8 before I got up and got breakfast and put a wash load in.. Thankfully though I felt alert. Devil boy had about the same amount of sleep that I did felt like a zombie.

The morning did not go too badly though and after breakfast I went and sorted out the washing and then I went to change and feed the twins while reading to them. Devil boy then went out to fix his friends computer and while he was out I managed to get Wolfie off for a nap as he was tired. This meant that I got half an hour of peace which I used to just relax and browse the internet for a bit for a change.

I had just started to feed Malach when Wolfie woke up. He woke up really grumpy and it took a while before he calmed down. I sorted out lunch and I was feeding Elbereth when Devil boy came back.

I then got ready and took Wolfie up to the doctors. I wanted the doctor to check his finger again after he would not take his medicine. The doctor was happy with his finger and said that he did not need to prescribe him anything for it. I also asked him to look at his foot as Wolfie had cut it in an awkward place and it was slow in healing. He prescribed some cream for to so hopefully it will be quick in healing.


After the doctors I decided to go to the park with Wolfie. I do not get the chance to go to the park with him often and I also though that it would be lovely just to spend some quality time with him. We had a lovely time and I put him on the swings and we both played on one of the climbing frame thing with a slide. We had great fun on that and Wolfie loved just running about. I am going to have to take him to the park more often no. I think I will have to take the twins with me as well.

When I got home we had dinner and I went through to see to the twins. They are getting used to the new feeding schedule and are beginning to wake on cue. I was reading to them and Wolfie was pottering about as well. I had to then hide the book form him. He was jumping all about me. He unfortunately head butted me at one point which really hurt and I felt slightly dazed for a minute or two. During this time Wolfie managed to step on my book and slightly damage the front cover. It is not much but LOL enough for me to have a slight huff about it.

He then went in the bath and I then sorted out his room and cleaned up his toys. Devil boy put him to bed and then went to his friend’s house for the night.

I decided to reply to messages and E-Mails early and then see to the twins when I noticed that Wolfie had not properly settled off.

I went though and read to him but a short while after I had left him I hear him again. I went through several times and I just put him in his bed after cuddling him but he would not settle. By this point I wanted to feed the twins, as they were ready so when I went through I snapped at him. I felt awful; about that and I cuddled and told him that I was sorry. I read to him and thankfully he managed to settle off.

I was then able to sort out the twins and read to them. After I did that I then went and started cleaning the kitchen. I did not wash the dishes but I piled them neatly to get done first thing in the morning. I cleaned the dining table that had got cluttered and I started clearing through clutter on one side. I have made good progress and the kitchen is beginning to look better again. I also managed to get some things done in the back room.

The only things that I have to do tonight is fold the nappies which I will do before I give the twins their last feed. I then plan to relax and read for a short while tonight as I have been busy for the most of it so far.

Back to homestart today

The night shift went well. The twin’s settled well but by the time that they had settled it was later that I had planned. I also needed to get up at 5am for Wolfie again. I think I will have to sort out his sleeping soon.

I heard the post at 7 and from the loud thud I knew that one of my Star Wars books had been delivered. I went and got the post before I went back to bed. I checked which book had arrived. It was Specter of the past. I am looking forward to reading those books. I will read them once I have finished reading the three books that went with the films IV to VI.


The twins slept until about 8am when I gave them a feed. After I had fed them I got up and I had breakfast. I also ordered the food online. I was lucky that there was still a delivery slot for today. This will mean that the shopping will be delivered between 9 and 11 tonight. It is late but it is an extra pound service charge for tomorrow’s delivery slots. I am also happier to get the stuff quicker.

I then went through to sort the twins out. While I was sorting the twins out our landlord came around to sort out the contracts for another year. I was just about to go and feed the twins when I noticed that it was raining. I had to rush out and get the nappies in before they got too wet. I was by then in a bad mood and cursing with everything that did not go quite how I would have liked.

Thankfully I calmed down while I was feeding the twins and I managed to read out to them for a while. I am really enjoying reading the book. I really enjoyed the film but in a book you can get thoughts and feelings that you cannot get in a film. There are some extra things that are not in the film so I am finding the book really funky.

After I fed the twins I got ready to go to homestart. Now that the schools are back on homestart is back on. It was nice to go back to it and Wolfie of course really likes it there. I fed the twins three as well and for the rest they sat in chairs. Now that they are more alert they can sit in the baby chairs at the place.

I was chatting to one of the women while I was there and she was telling me that her son and Wolfie like to play a lot and when she gets her son ready to go he asks after Wolfie. I think that is so sweet. It is really nice that Wolfie has someone to play with. When I went to one of the groups the other children tended to ignore him and he ended up playing on his own but I think it is lovely that three is someone at homestart that he can play with.

When I got home I put the twins into their baskets and they were soon asleep. They had been awake a lot in the afternoon and they were both falling asleep on the way home. I then needed to go out to the shop, as there were things that I needed. I saw my friend while I was on my way home so I decided to call in and see her while I was still near her house.

I was originally going to just call around for a few minutes but I stayed for a while and we had a funky chat. I really enjoy calling around while I am out.

The twins were still sleeping when I got back but they were beginning to stir. I had some dinner and then I went though and fed them and read to them. I am managing to make good progress on the book. The only downside is that as I am enjoying reading so much I really cannot be bothered to do any competitions at all. I will have to see what I can get some at the weekend, as I do like sending them off. I think I will only do the bare minimum until I pass through this phase.

I cleaned up Wolfie toys and while Devil boy was putting him to bed I put the nappies back out on the line as they were still too damp to be used and then changed and fed the twins.

The food order arrived shortly after I had sorted the twins out and cleaned some space in the kitchen. Elbereth is a little unsettled at the moment so I will give her a feed soon after I have put all of the shopping away.

All I have to do then is clean up a little after I have given the twins their last feed and then I can crash. I am not feeling too bad at the moment but I am looking forward to going to bed.

Operation feed twins till they are bursting has commenced

The night shift went well. I got the twins changed and fed and they settled off to sleep really nicely. I then decided to relax and read for a while before getting ready for bed.

I went to bed a little later than I planned and Wolfie waking up at 5am interrupted my sleep. I had hoped to get up at 7 and feed Elbereth and Malach but due to my later night it was 8 when I managed to get up.

The twins were stirring and I gave them both a good feed before I got up and had breakfast. After breakfast I changed Wolfie and I then went through and changed, dressed and fed the twins. I also listened to the radio as one of my friends was on it. She is presenting a spot on the show. I enjoyed listening to the show. The part that my friend was in was really funky. She was wall climbing this time and each time she does a spot on the show she will do something different. She made me laugh. I might just have to listen to that show as often as possible.

I had a bit of lunch and then as the twins were restless I gave them their lunchtime feed before going out with Wolfie into the back garden while Devil boy went out. I started sorting out the shed while Wolfie played with his toys in the back garden. He played really well and only once managed to escape when he was running after our cat. Thankfully he came back to me when I asked him which I was really happy about.

He was really funky after that and I managed to make good progress with the shed. I have thrown out lots, put lots of things in the recycle bucket and put some things aside for the charity shop. I think I will sort out through my collage materials tomorrow. What I do ton want to use I will take to the local clothes bank.


Devil boy got back and I made some soup, as I had not really had a proper lunch. After I ate that I went through to feed the twins again. I have also been drinking so much juice today so that hopefully I will produce lots of milk for them as well. I decided that I would feed them in the backroom in the afternoon as Devil boy was back. I managed to finish Han Solo’s revenge. I really enjoyed it and the ending was a little unexpected. I like to be pleasantly surprised, though I do not like big shocks.

I then browsed the Internet and had dinner while Wolfie climbed all over me. Devil boy sorted out dinner for him today and while his daughter was also over she had gone out as soon as she came in so I had barely seen anything of her.

I cleaned up while Wolfie had his bath and as he was putting him to bed his daughter came back in ready to go home.

I then once again fed the twins while watching a bit of TV. I turned it off through and started reading my next Star Wars book. I have started reading A new hope. I am enjoying it so far. I am really looking forward to reading the rest of the book.




After I had fed them I went and had a lice soak in the bath that Devil boy had run for me. It feels like I have not had a bath for a long time. I felt so refreshed by it. Once I had got out I browsed the Internet for a little and I replied to my friends.

The only things I need to do tonight is change and feed the twins and then clean up and get ready for bed. I thin that I will get an early night tonight so that I can get a good rest. I do hope that they twins are getting on funkily from what I have started doing.

I took the twins to get weighed today

The night shift went really well. Wolfie though woke yup at around 4am. I will have to do something about that. I think if he wakes at that time again I will work on trying to get him to settle back in his bed. If I manage to do that then he will sleep better after that.

The twins slept well and I fed them before I got up. I then went through and got breakfast as Devil boy got Wolfie breakfast this morning. Three of my Star Wars books arrived today. I am very much looking forward to reading them. I got the books for the films VI to IV. I am really looking forward to reading them. I am really glad that I have made such good progress with the Han Solo book now.






Devil boy went out with his mum in the morning to take his guitar to get fixed and he took Wolfie with him so it gave me a nice quiet time to get the twins ready. I read to them while I fed them.

When devil boy got back with Wolfie we had some lunch and I made a fresh batch of shortbread. Since I discovered how easy it was to make I will make it to keep my mind off chocolate. I have not been so tempted while I have been baking for myself.

After I had finished baking I tried to get Wolfie off for a nap. This unfortunately did not work today so afterward I just cleaned the kitchen and then went though to feed Malach before going out to get them weighted.

I did not have time to feed Elbereth but I decided that I could feed her while out. As I was on my way to the bank I noticed something outside the charity shop, which got my attention. It was a really funky kitchen set. As it was only £4 I decided that I would get it for Wolfie. It needs a little clean up but it is really funky for him.

I then went to the bank and then to the baby clinic. I went through to get the twins weighted and I was rally shocked to find out that they had not really put much weight on. Elbereth has gone from 3.62kg (8lb) to 3.66 (8lb1) and Malach has gone from 4.22 (9lb5) to 4.32kg (9lb 8) That was in a month though. The health visitors told me not to worry though as they are bright, healthy looking and alert but I cannot help but worry. They have gone off the bottom of the chart. My health visitor told me that it might be because they are sleeping so well at night they are not getting a nightly feed but they are not making up for that feed during the day. I have to make sure that they are getting plenty off feeds during the day. I will take them back next week to see how they have done. Elbereth has gone off the bottom of the chart and Malach is just at the bottom. I really hope they are all right.

On my way home I called in to see Devil boys grandma. His mum and dad were still there so I told them about the baby clinic. They left shortly after and I had a nice chat with his grandma after that.

When I got home I had dinner and I kept Wolfie entertained until he went into the bath. I then cleaned up and after he had settled off to sleep I gave the twins a good feed. They were asleep in their pram but I wok them up to feed them.

I am about to change them for bed and give them another feed. I am determined to make sure that they get enough food. Even if that means that I have to spend most of my time feeding them. My other jobs can wait. At least I can read to them while I am feeding them. I am really enjoying reading at the moment.

I wish I could burn all of the clutter that I have got

While I was getting ready my friend called. I chatted to her for a bit before I went to settle the twins. I told her of my plan to change my surname to Devil boys and she said to me that as I am changing my name why not get married instead. I tried explaining that we do not want to get married but I think she would like for us to get married. Bless her she even offered to lend me her dress. I do not think that will happen though.

I still managed to get ready in record time and I was through seeing to the twins at just gone 9pm. I needed to go back through for something else but I managed to get sorted really quickly. I have to make sure that I did this every time that Devil boys daughter stays over.

I changed and fed the twins and while I fed them I read to them. I started to feel very tired and Elbereth was settling nicely in her basket but Malach was being a bit fickle. He seemed like he had enough but he was a bit unsettled. I winded him and decided that I would try and settle him. He became unsettled which then set off Elbereth. I then got a little frustrated and snapped at Malach a little. I was really not happy with myself though and I decided to go and clean my teeth. Thankfully by the time I got out they were settled and I said sorry for getting uptight. I think it was because I was tired but I must work on not doing it again.

I managed to get a really good sleep and they slept from about 11pm until gone 8am. I then gave them both a feed before getting up and making breakfast for Devil boy’s daughter, Wolfie and I. I also put some washing in while breakfast was cooling.

Devil boy got up shortly after and after breakfast while I sorted the twins out he went into the garden with Wolfie and his daughter. While I was feeding the twins I started thinking about the stuff that I have got in the shed. I really am not looking forward to doing this. I was thinking that it would be so much easier if I could just set the lot on fire. It would save me having to sort through it. I would have to take out my collage material and the clothes that I was given for the twins but if I just put it in a pile in the garden and burn it. Ah well thee is no avoiding that job. I will have to look for the key soon.


They spent most of the morning out there. I fed the twins and then I managed to get some work started on my friends collage. I had started it before but I found a better frame so I have restarted it. The one that I had done before I will use and make a collage for Devil boy.

After Devil boy’s daughter had gone home we had some lunch and then I decided to get Wolfie off for a nap. Thankfully I managed to get him to take a nap again and while he was taking his nap I decided to have a go at baking some shortbread, as I did not have all of the ingredients to make fairy cakes. They were really easy to bake and they had not long come out of the oven when Wolfie woke from his nap. They tasted really nice fresh from the oven. They were soft and more like a cake that a biscuit. I am definitely never buying shortbread again. It is funky that I can make vegan shortbread as well.

The rest of the afternoon went well. Devil boy made dinner for us and after I got yoghurt for Wolfe he had his bath and went to bed. He settled off without a problem. Though while Devil boy was in the bath shortly after something must have disturbed him as he was crying again. I went through to se to him and he got back into bed and I put his Bob the builder soft toy in with him and I read to him for a short while. He settled off nicely.

I needed to sort out Devil boy’s hair once he was out of the bath and take a photo of him and then I dealt with the twins. I have changed them and fed them. They have now settled off nicely. I sat and watched Speed on th4e TV. I have not seen that film for a long time and it was nice seeing it again.

I just have some clothes to fold up and get ready for bed. Hopefully the twins are settled for the night. They definitely are really funky at settling off at

I could not resist the urge to eat chocolate

Wolfie did wake before I went to bed. He woke up at around 12 but he settled quickly after I had read to him. I will not read to him every time as I do not want him to get used to it tonight but I wanted to read a little.

The twins settled off really nicely though and they slept through the night again. They are so good at sleeping now. I am really happy that I have learned form all of the mistakes that I made with Wolfie and I have managed dot get them into good sleeping patterns.

I was going to get up and make breakfast when I noticed Malach stirring. I fed him and fell asleep while doing so it meant that I got up later than I intended. I was not happy about that. When I went through I saw that Devil boy had given Wolfie some chocolate. I was a bit annoyed at that because I thought that it was too early for him and that he could have had it with his lunch. I had a bit of a huff but the huff triggered me to really feel down. I really could not shake it away. I really do not like feeling like that as it is so much effort getting things done and I then feel down for feeling down. Bless Devil boy though as he made me my breakfast.

Devil boy took Wolfie over to his grandma’s house and I managed to get the twins changed and fed while reading to them. This helped lift my mood a bit and by the time that Devil boy got back with Wolfie I was feeing much better.

I then had something to eat and sorted out the nappies, which wee to be washed. As Wolfie seemed to be really tired I managed to get him off for a nap. I am going to try and get him off for a nap every day as once he settled off to sleep last night he slept well. It will also mean that I will make good progress with The lord of the rings.

Unfortunately while Wolfie was napping I could not longer resist the urge to not eat chocolate and I had a small chocolate bar. I did not really enjoy it and I felt bad for eating it. I am finding stopping eating chocolate much harder than hen I quit smoking and even not drinking alcohol is a lot easier than this.

I though that sorting out the shed would help take my mind off it but I could not find the key to the padlock so that was the end of that idea. The weather was not the best for sorting out the garden. I thought about starting a collage but I could not find the iron. I sorted out the plastic bottles and jars for recycling though and I had a sudden idea which could help take my mind off chocolate. I am going to bake muffins soon.

I remembered about how easy it was to make fairy cakes so I decided to bake some of them. It almost did not happen as I could not find the flour but thankfully I managed to find the flour and I was able to make them in just over half an hour. They were really nice and while I ate too many off them it took my mind off eating chocolate. I also do not feel sick so that is good. I am hoping that the more I get used to not eating chocolate with it around the easier it will get. The good thing will be that I think that I will manage to get some funky cakes baked to help keep my mind off chocolate.


Devil boy’s daughter came around shortly after so while she ran around with Wolfie I changed and fed the twins. I read some more of the book to them.

Devil boys daughter is staying over tonight and as she is staying over Devil boy and I have decided that they are going to go to bed really early tonight so that she does not become over tired and then hyperactive. Her mum said that she was sleeping in the car when coming back form swimming so she will be tired at the moment. I have messages to send but they will have to wait until tomorrow so that I can get things done tonight.

Wolfie has just settled off to sleep funkily and I am about to sort out cleaning the kitchen put out more nappies on the line and then see to the twins. I am also hoping that if I manage to get an early night I will be able to get up early tomorrow.

Clearing the shed and sorting the garden

The night shift went really well again. The twins settled off to sleep really well and Wolfie did not wake before I went to bed. I also managed to relax for a bit and read. I am really enjoying the Han Solo book. The story is beginning to develop nicely and so far the pace is good but not too fast.

The twins slept well through the night but unfortunately Wolfie woke up at 4.30. I am not sure why he is waking up early in the morning but I am hoping that it will stop soon. If it does not sort itself I will have to have a look at what we can do to help him sleep longer.

I fed the twins before I got up and when I got up Devil boy made breakfast for me. I browsed the Internet while I had that and after breakfast I changed Wolfie and then sorted out the twins.

Wolfie was getting increasingly cranky and even though I got lunch ready for us all he did not seem interested in what he had got. I knew that he was tired so after I ate my lunch I decided that I would get him to take a nap. Thankfully I managed to get him off for a nap. I was happy about that as I managed to get to read more of Lord of the rings. They are in Moria mines at the moment. I am enjoying it more now that I am reading it in bits that when I first read it all in one go. I am also taking in more as well.

I went out to the shops in the afternoon. I just went out by myself. It is a good walk to the shops and I like getting the exercise. When I got back Wolfie was up from his nap and I got a snack for him which he decided that he would not only not eat but that he would also find a new home for in the cassette player in my stereo.

I then decided that I would clean that out tomorrow as that will be rather a fiddly job and start clearing out the shed. I unfortunately was not really in the mood for clearing out and while I managed to get some clearing out and put a cardboard box into the recycle bucket I could not make much progress. Wolfie then came out in to the garden so I decided to sort out the fence at the bottom of the garden. I managed to get it mostly secured at the bottom. I think I will have a day working on the garden tomorrow.



Devil boy went out after we’d had dinner and while I was changing the twins I lost my temper at Wolfie when he was getting in the way. I felt really bad as he was only trying to help. I said sorry strait away and I gave him a kiss and a cuddle. He was funky again very soon and while I was feeling the twins he was lying on the floor with a blanket over him and I got him to pretend snore. It was very cute and he was giggling at me when I was making snoring noises.

Devil boy got back in time to bathe Wolfie but tonight he did not settle off well so I needed to go through to him. I decided to read to him tonight and he settled off funkily after that. I then went for a lovely soak in the bath.

I have managed to resist the temptation to eat chocolate today. At some points it was really hard and I at times had to eat something to take my mind off it. It will take time but the longer I manage to resist chocolate the easier it will get. I think it is amusing though I found it much easier to quit smoking that stop eating chocolate. Someone could offer me a cigarette and I would not think twice when saying no thank you but if someone offered me some chocolate it would take a lot of will power to say no. I am getting there though.


I have changed and fed the twins and they are nicely settled off now. I am going to browse the Internet for a few minutes before reading for about half an hour before going to bed.

I am managing to resist eating chocolate so far

The night shift went really well again. Wolfie did wake up at around 11pm though but I manage to get him to settle back to sleep before I went to see to the twins.

I was in bed a little later than I had hoped but the twins slept through then night and I managed to get a really good rest even though it was interrupted at 5am by Wolfie waking. I am not sure what is causing him to wake early but after being good his sleeping patter is not that good at the moment. Thankfully he at least is still settling well at night.

I got up a little later than I had wanted but I fell asleep again while I was feeding Malach. When I got up Devil boy had made breakfast for him and Wolfie so all I had to do was make breakfast for myself this morning. I put some washing in while I did this.

The morning went really well and as the weather was perfect drying weather I managed to get another wash load done. I am not up to date with the washing and I will not need to get any done tomorrow. I then managed to get my competitions sent off. I am not so behind with them after all.
I sorted out the twins and I have put Elbereth back in terry nappies as her rash has cleared up again. I have started reading the Han Solo book Han Solo’s revenge. I decided to read that book as I have not read it before and I have read Shadow of the Empire. It is really good so far. The author has managed to really write Hans character well and it has made me laugh as well.


Devil boys mum came over at and collected Wolfie and entertained ho for a few hours and after I had sorted out all of the washing I went out to get Easter eggs for Wolfie and for Devil boys daughter. I also got some fruit and some magazines.

On my way home I went around to Devil boys grandmas house. I had a really funky time there and I had a really nice chat with Devil boys mum. I stayed there for a coupe of hours.

By the time I got home it was nearly Wolfies bedtime. I made some dinner for me and while I was brining it through Wolfie wanted to have some. I put it into a pot for him and got him a fork to eat it with. I was not sure how well he would manage it as it was noodles and he has not managed to eat spaghetti before. But he not only managed it he really enjoyed it and came over to me for more when he had finished.

He then went for a bath and he settled off to sleep really nicely. Hopefully he will sleep funkily tonight. He has not woken up so far so I am hoping that it will mean that he will be good for tonight.

I have also managed so far to resist the temptation to eat the chocolate eggs that rare in the kitchen. It was really challenging at time s but I am managing to resist it. I think because I have decided that I will not eat any more chocolate that it has made it slightly easier for me. I managed to eat some toast to take my mind off it and I also cleaned the kitchen to help take my mind off it as well. It managed to work this time.

I changed and fed the twins while watching a cheesy film on the TV. I have been enjoying my relaxing nights, as the days are usually so hectic. I am planning on starting getting my collages done though at night but I think I might leave that for the next night or two. The only thing I have to do tonight though is fold up some clothes (which I might leave for tomorrow) and get ready for bed. I think I will just read for the next half n hour though before I do anything.

I am definitely going to stop eating chocolate

The night shift went really well and I managed to get the twins through and ready for bed for about 12.30.

Wolfie was disturbed by the wind though unfortunately. He woke up at around 2.30 and when I managed to get up the wind was howling. I just knew that there would not be a chance of getting him to settle so I took him through to Devil boy.

The twins then slept through the night and I managed to get up at around 8.30. Devil boy had been up since 7am so Wolfie had been kept well entertain this morning.

Devil boys daughter was around again this morning and she ran around like a loon with him while I sorted out some breakfast and browsing the Internet for a short while.

Devil boy gave Wolfie the packet of buttons that he got with his Easter egg but I thought that he would just give him a few buttons but he emptied the whole packet for him to share with His daughter. I was not annoyed at that but I just thought that the whole packet was too much for him.

He took him shortly over to his grandmas house though shortly after that so I was able to feed the twins while reading to them. I am really enjoying doing this. Feeding the twins is the only chance that I get to relax during the day at the moment.

When Devil boy got back he said that Wolfie was hyperactive, slapping and screaming. I thought well it is understandable with the amount of chocolate that he’d had. Devil boy was then feeling a little grumpy and tired so I decided after I had put the nappies out to go across with the twins and visit his grandma.

It was nice seeing her and I stayed for a few hours and had a funky chat with her. I managed to feed Elbereth and get her settled off and Malach slept virtually all of the time there. If he was not asleep though he did not cry for long or loudly.
I had a couple of biscuits but as I was walking home I noticed that I still had the taste of chocolate from last night and I still felt a little sick. This made me decided that I am definitely going to stop eating chocolate form now on. I think it is going to be tough but it has to be done. I cannot let this happen again.


I managed to get back and bring in the nappies as they had dried quickly due to the windy weather. I was able to get anther wash load in before the food order arrived. When I had unpacked it we started making lunch. A short while later Devil boy noticed a smell coming form the oven. He then found that Wolfie had put one of the wooden shapes that you get in toddlers puzzles and all of the plastic had melted and it was on fire. The smell in the house is awful. I will have to properly clean out the oven now.

Not too long after Wolfie then had his bath and Devil boy put him to bed. He settled off nicely but I am hoping that the weather does not disturb him again.

I then sorted out the twins as they had woken up from their nice long nap. I managed to get some competitions done while I fed them. Recently I have not been bothered about getting them filled in so I am behind again but I have managed to get some done. I am not too badly behind though thankfully and I have still been able to get some reading done. I have almost finished rereading the Star Wars book. I think I might read one of the Han Solo books that I have or reread shadows of the Empire.

After they had been sorted out I had a nice soak in the bath before replying to E-Mails. I am no going to sort the twins out again and then get ready for bed. I feel like another early night as I am feeling rather tired tonight. I thankfully no longer feel sick but it has only just faded. My system still feels clogged up with the effect of eating too much chocolate.

Wolfie had just woken up again so I have a feeling that tonight will be another disturbed night for him.

My brother and his girlfriend came around again

The night shift went really well. It started late. Once I had fed and changed the twins and then got ready for bed it was 2am by the time that I got to bed. I felt awake at the time but thankfully it did not take me too long before I was asleep.

The twins slept through though and I fed Malach at just gone 8 before I got up at 8.30. Devil boy’s daughter came around shortly after that. This worked out well as once I had sorted the twins out I had plenty of time to sort out the clothes that had piled up in the twins cot. I managed to find a few of Wolfie clothes that I wondered where they had got.

My brother came around at around lunchtime. He brought food for us all. The stiff that he got for me was really nice. I might have to see about getting some more of that at some point.

It was really nice seeing them though. They stayed for a lot of the afternoon and they took the books that I had got for dad with them. They are going to be stopping the night in a hotel in Edinburgh before going back home tomorrow. They are hoping to get up n the summer. Hopefully they will, as it would be really funky to see them again so soon. It was seeing them today that made em realise that I have missed them. I am really looking forward to get a car so I will be able to travel to see them as well.

After they had gone and I had seen to the twins I managed to get some cleaning up done in the kitchen while Devil boys daughter ran around with Wolfie.

Devil boy phoned up the company which we have our Internet connection through. He found out that we can upgrade our broadband for the same cost. We have also ordered something that we can attach to our line. This will mean that we can get free evening phone call and at the weekend as well. He was really glad that phoned up to ask about that.

The rest of the afternoon went really funkily and after Wolfie had gone to sleep I had a lovely soak in the bath. While I was in the bath I was thinking. I do not want to get married to Devil boy but it does feel a shame that I will have a different surname to Wolfe, Elbereth and Malach. I then had an idea to change my surname to the same as them. I asked what Devil boy though to it and he said that he though that it was a good idea. He did laugh and say that my mum will want for us to get married even more than now and start pressurising me. I hope she does not.

While I was feeding Elbereth I had a big craving for chocolate and I ate half an egg. I now feel sick. I have realised that I have to sort out my eating chocolate. I am fine if there is none in the house and I do not even think about it when I am out or ordering my food but if there is chocolate in the house then I have to eat it. I do not think that is good. When I feel like this I wonder why I ate so much. I do not enjoy chocolate when I have been like this. I also feel bad for eating so bad and letting myself eat too much and let myself eat so much that I feel sick. I am also going to go out for a lot of exercise tomorrow to help burn off the silly amounts of calories that I have consumed and drink a lot of water to help cleanse my system. I think I might have to stop eating chocolate all together, even vegan chocolate.


I am going to make sure that I also get an early night tonight. I have managed to get Elbereth settled and I just have to go and sort Malach out. I will real and read at the same time. I have decided that I will be in bed by 12 though.

My brother came to visit

The night shift went really well last night. They settled off nicely even though it was late. Wolfie was not good though He woke a couple of times before I went to bed. I gave him some Calpol though and I put the heating on before I went to bed and that seemed to help him.

After the twins had settled though they slept all through the night and I also managed to get a really good sleep.

I got up and got breakfast for Wolfie and I. I then cleaned up the bathroom a little ready for my brother coming up today. I washed the mats from the bathroom and our bedding. Even though there was one or two showers of rain I noticed on the horizon that the sky was clear and there was a good breeze which would hopefully mean that if it did rain during the day it would not last for long.

Devil boy then got up and started playing on the computer. I got Wolfie dressed and while I was seeing to the twins I also kept Wolfie entertained. Thankfully though he came off the computer and while I went out he managed to finish off the bathroom, fix the sink, hover the living room and clean the kitchen.

I needed to go out to get some things sorted. I managed to get some books while I was out. I got two more books for dad, a cooking book and a book about making candles. I am really pleased about that, as I would love to make candles to sell at craft fairs. The book does not look like it has been used at all. All four books only cast £1.

I went to my friend’s house while I was out. It was nice to get out without any of the children. The twins are good to take out but their pram is rather bulky to push. I had a nice time and I have seen yet another Star Wars thing that I would like to get (Star Wars plug in and play thingy)

On the way home I managed to remember to make an appointment for Wolfie at the doctors. I have tried putting his medicine in his juice and he would not touch it so we will see what the doctor can do.

When I got back I had something to eat before Devil boy went o his grandmas. Shortly after he had gone out I had to run out and rescue the washing from the rain. The washing had dried nicely but I did not want it to get washed again by the rain. While the shower was not that long it would have turned the bedding from dry to wet. Thankfully I was able to not only get the things in without the getting too wet but also while Wolfie was occupied.

My brother came around a short while later with his girlfriend. It was lovely to see them. It is the first time that they have seen the twins. LO the god thing about twins is that they get one baby each. The twins were really good though and while they cried at some points they settled quickly. My brother had fun with Wolfie. He was making silly noises at him and waving his arms about. Wolfie loved this and was running about giggling madly. They are not up for that long but they will be over tomorrow and they will bring some lunch over.

They brought up some things with them today. Including Easter eggs for Devil boy, Wolfie and I. I completely forgot to get them one. I always seem to forget to get them Easter eggs. I will have to see what I can get sorted out for them.

Mum also sent up some things with them, which was really nice. She sent up some money. I decided though that I would not spend it on anything practical. I decided to get myself some Star wars books. I ordered them later. I managed to get 5 books and while I went £5 over that was not too bad. I am really looking fo4rward to them arriving. I now have the books to accompany all of the films now.

My brother and his girlfriend did not stay for too long though as they had to leave and get dinner but at least I will see them tomorrow. I wish that they were staying longer though. They are going back on Thursday. They are spending a night in Edinburgh so that they can get some time together.

Mum sent up some little sample bottles of wine. Devil boy and I decided to have one of the tonight and even though it was a small glass of wine I can feel it affecting me. I do not like the feeling though. I am really going off drinking alcohol.


I am thankfully beginning to feel a lot better now and I am going to get a glass of juice before I go and sort out the bedding and then change and feed the twins. I will read while feeding the twins and then I will go to bed as I am feeling rather tired now.

Yet another very busy day

The night shift went really well last night and while Elbereth woke a few times during the night she settled quickly. I think that maybe she is going through a growth spurt. I might get them weighed tomorrow to see ho they are getting on.

Wolfie slept well though and he woke up at not long past 6am.

I got up at around 9. I am struggling again to get out of bed any earlier than this through. I think that because I have been so busy recently I have needed the sleep to get the energy back.

When I got up I washed and cleaned the kitchen while I made the breakfast. I then brought in the nappies from outside and got a wash load done. I was at least able to relax while I ate my breakfast before I went through and sorted the twins out.

Wolfie pottered about and came through to me at times while I was feeding the twins. I was reading to the twins while I fed them. I am enjoying this. It gives me chance to relax in the morning and I get to read when I normally do not have the opportunity. After I had fed them I needed to wash the twins bedding again as the blankets were due a wash and their pillows that they sleep on needed washing again.


I was a little annoyed though with Devil boy. I had been so busy all morning but all he had done was play non his computer game. He has just put the TV on for him and then left him to it. I do not like the TV being on too much and recently it has been on far too much. Devil boy said last Wednesday that he was spending too much time on the computer. He said that he would like to have time to spend with Wolfie, learn how to play the guitar, learn German and learn skills to get a job but he has done nothing. I cannot force him to do anything and I know that nagging will not work but while he has got part way there I wish he would actually do something other than just saying what he would like to do.

I decided that I would take the twins out in the afternoon and get some things that we needed form the shops and instead of coming home strait away I would go to visit my friend. I hoped that he did spend some time with Wolfie.

My friend was not there when I first got there so I had a funky chat with her husband until she got home. I was telling her about Wolfie not taking his medicine so she told me to put the medicine in his juice. I will try that tomorrow and see how he gets on with it.

I also asked her about a place locally where I can get inexpensive furniture to replace the broken fitted wardrobe. She told me of possible places where I can get the number for the place from. I will call in at the charity shop tomorrow and ask them. I would like to get that sorted out as soon as possible as I do not like having the broken door being in his room.

I made the dinner when I got back and shortly after Devil boy went out, as it was his brother’s birthday. I managed to feed the twins get Wolfie room ready for his bedtime. Sort out his bath and then bathe him, get him ready for bed and then read to him with out too much trouble. The only challenge I had was at one point I became absolutely exhausted and I thought I was not going to make it through the night.

Thankfully not only did Wolfie settle off to sleep perfectly but I have managed to get back some of my energy so I have managed to hover the living room (and the cobwebs from the ceiling) see to Elbereth and clean the kitchen up a little.

I am not too sure why but for the last week while I was busy before it has stepped up a gear and I feel like I am non-stop. It feels strange but even sitting down for half an hour to read feels like a luxury at the moment. Thankfully I am managing funkily and I am not even getting stressed but I am definitely going to have a nice soak in the bath and relax tomorrow at some point. (LOL if only that were my bath though)

A bit of an unsettled night

The night shift did not go well. The twins settled off really nicely and it started off well but Elbereth woke up at around 2am and I was just about to feed her when I heard Wolfie crying. I decided to see to him first. I went through and read to him for a bit and he settled off back to sleep nicely.

I then went through and started feeding Elbereth. I had not been feeding her for that long when I heard Wolfie crying again. Devil boy though went through to see to him and I heard him take him through to the living room with him.

The rest of the night shift did not go too badly. Elbereth woke a few times but she settled quickly enough and I fed the both of the before I got up at around 9.30. Devil boy’s daughter was running around with Wolfie as I got all of our breakfasts ready. When Devil boy got up he told me that when he went through to get Wolfie his bedroom light was on. I know that Wolfie cannot reach the light switch on so I must have left it on when I went through to see to him. That must mean that it was my fault that he woke up again…opps.

After breakfast I changed Wolfie and the twins and before I fed them I managed to get the nappies washed. I managed to get some reading to them while I was feeding them. When Devil boy’s daughter is over I like to feed the twins in the back room as it gives me some moments of peace. Wolfie kept coming through to the back room and pointing up to the ceiling and saying train (the light shade has Thomas the tank engine in it) it was very sweet though as one time he came through to me he bought his trains that he has got with him.
When Devil boy went to take his daughter back I made Wolfie and I some lunch. When Devil boy got back I then was able to get some tidying up done in the kitchen. One of the sides had become very cluttered so I managed to get it cleared and cleaned. I also managed to find some string so after I had put the nappies out onto the line I was able to start tying the fence at the bottom of the garden. It will be nice to let Wolfie run about without worrying about where he will be. I am also going to sort out a section for the twins to crawl about in as well. I really need to sort out the shed but it would be nice for my children to be outside with me.


I also managed to speak to my friend in the afternoon. She went out for her birthday last night. She had a really funky time but she was telling me while she was in the club that she used to go in lots before she had her daughter she felt old and when she went into one section she felt too young to be in there. She told me that it was like being in limbo.

I went back into the kitchen and started sorting through some of the clutter in the cupboards. I found some of the wooden puzzles that I got for Wolfie. I am going to try them and see if he is any better with them. The first time I showed them to him all he wanted to do was bite them but now he looks more interested in using them. I will only let him have then though when he is supervised, as there are too many small parts that could end up all over the place.

A productive day but unfortunately also a broken door

The twins settled really well last night and even though Elbereth woke up at around 5.30 I managed to get a really good nights rest. Wolfie woke up early though but I think that is because he is getting used to sleeping in a proper bed now. I will get some new bedding for him and maybe a pillow for him.

I had a bit of a lie in. I think that because I was so busy yesterday I was absolutely exhausted.
I managed to get Wolfie to take his medicine though and he waited for the hour that was needed before I made out breakfast. I managed to get some washing done and fold the clothes that I brought in. I really like the warm weather now, as it is very funky for drying clothes (though that is the only thing that I like about the hot weather)

Devil boy’s daughter dame around and I sorted out the twins and put the drops in their eyes. Their eyes look so much better. I then went through to give Wolfie his medicine before putting him for a nap. I asked Devil boy to do it but he had no luck. He said it tasted disgusting. I had a taste of it and it did. It was no wonder he would not take it. I am going to make another appointment with the doctors and see if there any better tasting medicines or ways how I can persuade Wolfie to drink it or if I can mix it with anything that tastes nice to him.

I was not able to get Wolfie off for a nap. I was not too bothered though as he has managed to get a lie down and he will still be z a lot less grumpy than if he had not got a rest. I also got the chance to read more Lord of the rings so that is good.

I then managed to sort out a few things in the twin’s room. I moved the books that I wanted to move into the bookcase that I have got. I need to sort out some curtains for it but I will cover it up for now until I work out how to put the curtains on it. I also moved Wolfies toy box into his room. I am going to keep most of his toys in his room now that he is spending more time in there. It will also keep the living room cleaner as well.

I went out into the garden and sorted out the fence at the bottom of the garden. I really need to sort out what is in the shed but it would be great if Wolfie, Elbereth and Malach could also come out without worrying about where they are. I managed to get some work done but I need to secure it properly. At least there is a fence covering the bottom of the garden now. Devil boy also said that he would help clear the garden as soon as possible.

I then baked some fairy cakes with Devil boy’s daughter. I really enjoyed it. It was nice getting something done with her. I did not do a good job of the icing though. I am not bothered as it was the first time that I had attempting to make icing and I know where I went wrong so I think next time it should go better.

All was going well though until I heard a thud form Wolfies room. I went in and saw Devil boy’s daughter looking guilty. I then noticed that one of the mirrored doors to the fitted wardrobe was off its rail. I though that it was ok and all I would have to do was put it back on its rail. When I went to do this though I noticed that the mirror was cracked. I taped it up to keep Wolfie safe form it. I had a think about what we should do and I through that we could ask the land lord if we could take out the fitted wardrobe and put in normal wardrobes. I did not like the fitted wardrobes. I will see the landlord in the next few days. I am hoping that the door will be safe until I can get it sorted.
I have replied to messages early so that I can relax tonight before I go to bed. I will be going to bed earlier tonight as Devil boy’s daughter is staying the night.